1 neutron
125 assistant neutrons
75 vice neutrons
111 assistant vice neutrons
This gives it an atomic mass of 312. The 312 particles are held together by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called morons.
Since it has no electrons, Bureaucratonium is inert. However it can be detected chemically as it impedes every action with which it comes in contact. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Bureaucratonium caused one reaction to take four days to complete when it would have normally occurred in less than one second.
Bureaucratonium has a normal half-life of approximately three years, at which time it does not actually decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which assistant neutrons, vice neutrons and assistant vice neutrons exchange places. Some studies have shown that atomic mass actually increases after each reorganization.
Research at other laboratories indicates that Bureaucratonium occurs naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at certain points such as government agencies, large Internet Service Providers, large corporations and universities and can usually be found in the newest, best appointed and best maintained buildings.
Scientists point out that Bureaucratonium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reaction where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine how Bureaucratonium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but results to-date are not promising.