Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...
-
your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
-
he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
-
you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
-
he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
-
he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
-
he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum foil
-
he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
-
he says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing frequencies"
-
he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
-
he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
-
he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
-
he says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
-
he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
-
he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
-
he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
-
he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
-
he paints the starship John Deere green
-
he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
-
he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
-
his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
-
he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
-
his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
-
he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
-
his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of beans
and weenies
-
he sets phaser to "Cajun"